writing

Dear myself,
Since I was in secondary school, I noticed that my confident level was very low. I really wanted to join the brasband group. But I never have the gut to join the other students in the long queue for registration. I believe I was talented, but I was too shy. So I only joined a choir group. There I could still sing and enjoy music.
After graduating from secondary school, I went to a private college for a matriculation program. There, I learnt more about myself. I was so used to attend solat berjemaah when I was in school and thus I just continued my routine in matrics. I still a reserve person, but sometimes I could be so loud especially when it came to giving opinion. In matriculation I really enjoy learning. I managed my time very well. I woke up daily around 4, solat, studied, attended classes, and right after Isya' I slept. That was my routine. I was happy to know that I was actually a morning person.No wonder I didn't like evening prep time when I was in school.
When I went to a university for a bachelor program, my first semester was so terrible. To be honest that was the first time I mixed with older students and different races in a class. I tought I was so stupid and couldn't cope up with studies. Later in the second semester, I worked harder, forced myself to ask in class whenever I didn't understand and made appoinments with lecturers. I was better, better in studies, managing time and mixed around with the other students. And the most important thing was I learn how to study, how to think creatively.
-----------------------------------------end of story
It is funny. Now to be honest I do not enjoy writing but I am learning. The way I learn now is by writing whatever I have in mind. It is funny because at the age of 33, I still don't have the skill to write because I do not make writing as habit. I do it only occasionlly. But now I believe it will never be too late. I will start from now. I am a researcher. A researcher must be able to write. Although writing technical paper is not similar as blog writing, I feel that blog writing is a suitable ground for me to practice, to break the feeling of 'not feeling comfortable' whenever I sit in front of my laptop and want to start writing. I will begin with writing rubbish but I know I will polish up my skill. InshaAllah.