be thankful

have you been mad to your spouse because you think he/she never thank you enough?
have you been frustrated at your boss because he never say thank you for all the works he dumped to you?
did you felt bullied by your family members because you had to cook and clean the dishes after every meal?
If you have felt all the feelings above, you must be a great person.
However, may I ask again you one question?
HAVE YOU THANK YOUR CREATOR for the life that HE HAS BEEN GIVING TO YOU?
If you have, than you're the greatest person! :)

Sometimes we always complaint. We never satisfied with other people. Actually there's no need for you to feel so because it is hard to change people. So, what is the solution to be a happier person is by being a thankful person. People will forget but Allah NEVER FORGET. Allah has been giving you His MERCY...always be thankful to Him..

Last but not least, don't expect anyone to say thank you, or to appreciate you. Maybe to them you don't deserve their thank you because you haven't done good enough. Then correct yourself, forgive yourself, be kind to yourself by saying Alhamdulillah...astaghfirullah....ask forgiveness to Allah..and don't forget to SMILE!

Iya dan Jangan

Jangan..

Jangan pandang rendah pada seseorang atau pada sesuatu perkara. I know very little. Kita disuruh 'bersangka baik atas setiap perkara'. keep on telling yourself...bersangka baik. Latih diri untuk bersangka baik atas setiap perkara. Keep on saying Alhamdulillah... keep on remembering Allah so that your mind will not be full with negative thoughts. Negative thoughts will kill you. Again...what you know is very little. Focus on to your duties dan berzikir dan berdoalah sentiasa kepada Allah....

Jangan merungut dengan kesusahan. Ingatlah semua yang terjadi atas izin Allah. Ucaplah innalillahiwainnailaihirajiun. Semoga Allah beri kesabaran dan menggantikan kesusahan dengan kesenangan.

Jangan rasa susah dengan tanggungjawab. Ingatkan bahawa tanggungjawab itu semua dari pada Allah.

Jangan rasa susah apabila terasa kita memikul tanggungjawab orang lain. Berhenti sejenak untuk berfikir dan tenangkan perasaan. Ucapkanlah Alhamdulillah...puji-pujian kepada Allah.. Sebenarnya apa yang kita fikir tidak semestinya betul. Allah lebih mengetahui. Ingatlah setiap perkara datangnya dari Allah. Mohon petunjuk dari Allah agar setiap apa yang dilakukan itu mendapat redha darinya.

Jangan terlalu banyak bergaul dan bercakap kerana kita mudah melakukan dosa dengan percakapan. Cakap yang terlalu banyak boleh mematikan hati. Cakap yang perlu sahaja. Usahakanlah... Avoid joining a group of noisy people talking about nothing really important. If they need your contribution, they will ask for it. Don't be a busy body.

Iya...

Bacalah Al-Quran.

Berdoalah, sambil berusaha, sambil bertawakkal.

Berzikir, bertakbir, bertahmid..

Tundukkan pandangan.

Diam, kerana diam adalah sifat orang berjaga-jaga. Orang yang bising senang diserang musuh. Ingatlah musuhmu paling utama adalah syaitan dan nafsumu sendiri.

----Akhirnya...Ya Allah...aku tahu bukan senang untuk menjadi baik. kuatkan azamku, usahaku, tawakkalku kepada Mu untuk berakhlak mulia Ya Allah....janganlah Engkau biarkan nasib kami ditentukan oleh diri kami sendiri Ya Allah...amin ya rabbal a'lamiin.

why worry

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim..
I am happy because I choose to be happy.
All the responsibilities I carry are determined by Allah The Almighty.
Why worry about not getting a PhD?
Is it because I have to pay back to KPT?
Or is it because I am afraid I cannot get other job to feed my babies?
No no no life is short so no worries
Improve myself and focus all energy on completing my duties
Afterall if I think I can, only with the permission of Him I may succeed.

To Wageningen with family or not?

My scholarship will end next February 2015. I have about 1 year to finish. I must go back to Wageningen by latest June 2014. I may go alone, or I may go with my family. Going alone means I have to endure the hard feeling of leaving my babies. Going with my family means I have to struggle to manage my babies like sending them to school, cook, taking care of them and me struggle even harder to finish my phd. Both have their good and bad stories. Allah knows best! Amin.

writing

Dear myself,
Since I was in secondary school, I noticed that my confident level was very low. I really wanted to join the brasband group. But I never have the gut to join the other students in the long queue for registration. I believe I was talented, but I was too shy. So I only joined a choir group. There I could still sing and enjoy music.
After graduating from secondary school, I went to a private college for a matriculation program. There, I learnt more about myself. I was so used to attend solat berjemaah when I was in school and thus I just continued my routine in matrics. I still a reserve person, but sometimes I could be so loud especially when it came to giving opinion. In matriculation I really enjoy learning. I managed my time very well. I woke up daily around 4, solat, studied, attended classes, and right after Isya' I slept. That was my routine. I was happy to know that I was actually a morning person.No wonder I didn't like evening prep time when I was in school.
When I went to a university for a bachelor program, my first semester was so terrible. To be honest that was the first time I mixed with older students and different races in a class. I tought I was so stupid and couldn't cope up with studies. Later in the second semester, I worked harder, forced myself to ask in class whenever I didn't understand and made appoinments with lecturers. I was better, better in studies, managing time and mixed around with the other students. And the most important thing was I learn how to study, how to think creatively.
-----------------------------------------end of story
It is funny. Now to be honest I do not enjoy writing but I am learning. The way I learn now is by writing whatever I have in mind. It is funny because at the age of 33, I still don't have the skill to write because I do not make writing as habit. I do it only occasionlly. But now I believe it will never be too late. I will start from now. I am a researcher. A researcher must be able to write. Although writing technical paper is not similar as blog writing, I feel that blog writing is a suitable ground for me to practice, to break the feeling of 'not feeling comfortable' whenever I sit in front of my laptop and want to start writing. I will begin with writing rubbish but I know I will polish up my skill. InshaAllah.

Facebook, teman dan fokus

Dah lama tak on facebook, dah berapa bulan tak ingat. Bukan tak rindu kawan-kawan...terutamanya kawan-kawan di luar negara, yang bukan senegara. Apalah khabar mereka di sana. Ish, aku bukan tak kenang kawan, tapi memandangkan facebook tu akan membuatkan aku terlalu leka..terpaksalah aku bertahan tiada berfacebook. Tapi syukur, kurang rasa bersalah. hehehehe...semoga Tuhan redha....amin.

Pagi ni ni aku dapat sms yang sangat menyentuh hatiku. Supervisor PhD ku menasihatkanku supaya bersabar dengan kesusahan yang aku hadapi. Beliau memintaku membaca surah Al-Imran ayat 200 yang maknanya berbunyi, "Wahai orang yang beriman! Bersabarlah kamu (menghadapi segala kesukaran dalam mengerjakan perkara-perkara yang berkebajikan), dan kuatkanlah kesabaran kamu (lebih daripada kesabaran musuh, di medan perjuangan), dan bersedialah (dengan kekuatan pertahanan di daerah-daerah sempadan) serta bertakwalah kamu kepada Allah, supaya kamu berjaya (mencapai kemenangan)." Terima kasih Tuhan, kerana bukan sahaja mengurniakanku ketua (supervisor) yang boleh menasihatiku tentang pengajianku, bahkan juga mengajakku mengingati dan bertakwa kepada Mu.

Benar, tugasku banyak. Bukan aku seorang. Teman-teman di luar sana juga mempunyai dugaan mereka masing-masing. Jadi, fokus huda FOKUS! Tetapkan matlamat, senseng lengan..opppss..jangan sampai buka aurat. :) Jadi, bila pergi kerja, wajib usaha sungguh-sungguh. Jangan buang masa. Fokus! Rehat bila perlu. Solat tepat masa. Aurat pelihara. Pergaulan jaga. Kalau dah buat kewajipan kita, yang lain serahkan kepada Pemilik Alam Semesta. Jangan takut Jangan Sedih huda! Chioookkkk!!!!! hehehehehehe.....

Akhir kata semoga Allah terima amal saya dan amal kamu. Amin.

Sama macam orang lain

Sama je. Setiap orang ada masalah masing-masing. Setiap orang sedang berdoa dan menunggu-nunggu doa dan harapan dimakbulkan Tuhan, supaya usaha membuahkan hasil.

Untuk kes aku, biasalah, apa je semua pelajar seperti aku harapkan? Kalau masuk dewan periksa, mesti nak score, kalau buat research, mesti nak dapat result bagus-bagus, lepas tu last sekali dapat publish experiment tu dalam jurnal yang bagus, akhir sekali grad on time. Nampak macam senang, tapi jalannya penuh liku-liku berduri. Terutamanya macam aku yang belum boleh berdikari sepenuhnya. Masih perlukan tunjuk ajar orang untuk buat sesuatu perkara. Jadi kalau mengharapkan orang lain terpaksalah menunggu 'masa' orang. Lagi satu bab duit untuk buat research. Buat masa sekarang aku masih lagi terpaksa meminta-minta daripada kawan-kawan dan allocation daripada projek lain untuk membiaya projek ku. Apa nak buat. Emmm....dah nak masuk satu tahun lima bulan aku buat PhD, tapi belum ada satu result pun yang boleh aku reportkan. Sedih memang sedih, tapi apa nak buat. Semua yang aku dapat ni, pertolongan daripada orang, ilmu yang aku dapat, biaya yang aku dapat, semua pun rezeki daripada Allah jugak. Takpelah, bersabarlah yang boleh aku beritahu diriku.

Okay semua! Bahagian kita ialah USAHA, USAHA dan terus USAHA. Yang nak tentukan kita berjaya atau tak, hanya Allah. Semoga usaha kita berada di jalan yang betul, dan dipelihara daripada perkara-perkara mungkar. Amin. Tuhan, berkatilah semuanya dan ampunkan.....