Puasa Ganti

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah...

Hari ni nak cerita pasal puasa ganti. Tahun 2008, sebulan saya tak puasa sebab melahirkan anak kedua. Tahun 2009, bulan Ramadhan terpaksa bayar fidyah kerana tak habis ganti puasa. Tak ingat berapa hari. Tahun 2010, bulan Ramdhan bayar fidyah lagi kerana puasa 2008 dan 2009 pun belum habis ganti. Tahun tersebut sahaja 15 hari tak puasa. Tahun 2011, bayar fidyah lagi. Dan sebelum Ramadhan 2012 mesti ganti 30 hari, tak nak bayar fidyah lagi.

Sekarang dah 23 Muharam 1433, inshaAllah tinggal 26 hari lagi yang perlu diganti. Sebenarnya saya memang tak larat berpuasa jika tidak di bulan Ramadhan. Tambahan lagi setelah 2008 (anak kedua lahir dan tempoh menyusu hingga setahun setengah, setelah itu mengandung pula anak ketiga, melahirkan pada 2010 di bulan Syaban dan sambung menyusu lagi, memang saya tak larat. Tenaga banyak diperlukan untuk menyusukan anak dan mengandung. Dan sekarang saya berpuasa ganti, memang saya tak produktif di pejabat.

Ampunkan saya wahai Tuhan. Saya wajib mencari rezeki yang halal dan berkat. Janganlah kerana lembik saya akibat puasa ganti ini membahayakan status rezeki saya. amin..

rewards

It is a nature of human to long for rewards. We will be very happy when we get good marks in exams, our paper get published in renowned journal, and when people say good thing about us. Rewards will improve our confidence level and motivate us to work better and harder.

Therefore, it is so worth to remind ourselves to give rewards to our children, spouse, and friends whenever they deserve it. Don't be too stingy, please say something good to them. Must be something good... People don't know what is in your heart. If you love someone, say it, show them your love.

Agree to disagree

Conflict has been part of human's life since the creation of the first man, Adam, Hawa, and their children. When a conflict occurs between two persons, mostly cause by different interest, people tend to judge which opinion is right or wrong. Unfortunately, no one is right or wrong but these two unlucky people will continue to be in conflict. Most of the time, so much energy will be wasted to negative feeling. So what should we do when we're in conflict??

1- Isolate yourself from the people whom you're having conflict, calm down and put aside your ego
2- Put yourself in their position and think the way they might be thinking
3- Relate their opinion with your opinion
4- Try to find the balance between the two opinions
5- Don't be mad, believe that no one is wrong and no one is right, it is just the difference!
6- Decide something that both parties will be in win-win situation

Lastly, conflict management needs practice. Try your best to always be calm and positive. Remember, keep telling yourself that others opinion also important. Never forget to ask help from Allah, as HE knows best what are the best for you.

only 12%

Dear readers,
How do I use to the maximum all the potentials in me? I have lots of energy and ideas but always my time is wasted into something else which is less important. I have to force myself to do the besttttt!!!!!! I am the best!!

Berita

Angin,

khabarkan padanya aku ingin menjadi yang terbaik untuknya

aku ingin menjadi solehah

aku ingin menjadi terpuji

wanita berfikiran positif dan berakal cemerlang

berhati luhur

dengan amal yang sentiasa ikhlas mengharapkan redha Ilahi

Namun

laluan ke jannah itu hamparannya tikar berduri

syaitan dan nafsu tidak akan pernah jemu

maafkan aku seringkali impian ku tertewas

kupohon kekuatan daripada Ilahi

Kuharap

engkau dan mereka mengerti

andai aku pergi

tahulah engkau aku ini pernah meniti

hamparan yang berduri

Nukilan,

wanita padi, makin tunduk kerna berisi..

tak sedap hati

Selalu perkara yang terjadi adalah tak seperti yang diinginkan. Apa yang paling dikesalkan adalah harapan daripada diri sendiri...selalu diri sendiri tak menjadi seperti yang diri sendiri inginkan.

when mama's already home

I did not have much problem to win back my youngest daughter, Hannah after six months I was away from her. Most probably because she stayed with my mother, my two sisters and my two nieces age 21 and 17. So Hannah used to have many women around her. Same went to Adam and Fatima, obviously because they always recognize me as their mother. I was so thankful and never can describe the feeling when finally we met again.

Adam and Fatima always quarrel with each other about who wants to sleep next to me. In fact, this problem happen since I had Hannah almost one year ago and now it happen again almost every night. It is a problem to decide who will sleep next to me because Hannah also wants to be on my one side (of course Hannah has win the competition). I will always try my best to console Adam since he's the eldest brother and can understand my explanation better than Fatima. The easiest way to discuss with Adam is by telling him that I will change my position and sleep next to him when the two girls are already slept. Unfortunately I did not do as promised a couple of times and had disappointed Adam. Just last night when I broke the promise again, when he saw me this morning, the first question he asked was why didn't I sleep next to him. Emm...after today I know I must not break the promise again.

Why do I take this thing so seriously since I know to some of you might think that this problem is very simple. The answer is, whenever I have argument with my babies, I will never let them sleep with bad feeling. I believe that it is not healthy for kids to sleep with negative emotions. I will try my best to finish any argument and tell them that they are good children and I love them so much.

Empty head

Today is Thurday. Next Thursday I will be boarding an airplane, to go back to Malaysia. Home sweet home. Actually life is more challenging in every aspects back in my country. But that is my real life. I thank God for my life. I pray that I will always do the best in all situation. I hope I can always control my emotion (that can turn out to be really crazy, God please forbid).

Emm...so lately I didn't do much reading like I used to do weeks before. It was not because I already had enough knowledge, but mainly because I finished writing my proposal last week. So I told myself (indirectly) that I could have some rest. But when I read the proposal again yesterday, I realized how ' imperfect' it was. In other way, there were to many things to be improved. Huh....it was real hard to write when you didn't know about what you were writing. How do I learn to write!!!

I must learn writing. Since my English is not perfect, with a very limited vocabularies, and with least skills...my writing looks dry and the paragraphs do not seem to integrate nicely. Arrrggghhh......!!! Now rather than checking my facebook every now and then, I better do an english exercise from the internet. pllleeeaaaasssee.....

(Soo, no rest for me? Time is gold..do something fun but make sure I am learning from it)

End of story...see...no coherence of ideas right?? The topic jump from one to another!!! Huwwwaaarrgghhh!

Challenges in summer

It's summer. A very challenging season for me because night is short and I have to perform three prayers (sholat), one around 10:00 pm till 11:40pm [maghrib], one between 11:40pm till 03:30 [i'sya'], and final [fajr] between 03:30 till 05:30. The problem is, I normally go to bed around 10 pm. This is my standard sleeping time wherever I am...so after maghrib I sleep and I have to wake up again at least one time, normally between 03:00 to 04:00 am to perform Isya'and Fajr. Alhamdulillah, normally I manage not to skip these prayers although I missed few times in which I was really tired and did not awake at all. Again alhamdulillah...if it is not from the strenght given from Him, I will never be able to do my prayers. (This is why when we heard adzan (calling for prayers) when the bilal said "haiya a'la sholah" which means lets perform prayer, we have to answer it by "lahau lawala quwwata illa billah" which means there is no change or power except through Allah).

This reminds me a lot to always be thankful to Allah whenever I finish performing my sholat, and never ever look down to people who do not perform their prayers. Of course, our effort is to teach and train a muslim (especially those who are close with us) to perform prayers at the very beginning of age, but our hearts belong to Allah. HE can twist our hearts, even if we are very well trained, we could fall into the false direction. Therefore, we must not be proud of ourself but keep asking guidance from Allah and be thankful.

May Allah guide us and protect us...forgive us Our Lord...

PhD oh PhD

Salam,

This blog now is my diary. Of course I will not write anything privacy here. Obviously now I need someone to talk to. But since nobody can listen to me now...here I am..blogging.

Just met my supervisor. I received many comments from him and they were constructive comments.

He told me how to think and organize my idea and put them into a comprehensive way of writing. It was so nice that he tried his best to simplify his talk so that I got to the point. Emm...what's the point of talking if I didn't understand right?

Fuh....actually...I have to start writing now. :) Anyway, tips from my supervisor,

1. Write backward....for my case I have listed 5 objectives, therefore, construct my text based on the objectives.

2. Emm??

Hehe..till then!

Pesanan kepada anak-anak

Salam,
Juga peringatan kepada saya seorang anak;

First, SOLAT 5 waktu sehari semalam.
Seterusnya...

1. Sentiasa doakan ibu dan ayah, "Ya Allah, ampunilah kedua ibu dan ayahku dan kasihanilah kedua ibu bapaku sebagaimana mereka mengasihaniku sejak kecil".
2. Janganlah menyakiti hati ibu dan ayah. Gembirakan mereka.
3. Selalu menziarahi ibu dan ayah.
4. Rajin-rajin tolong ibu dan ayah.

InshaAllah akan disambung bila ada idea untuk improve.

Pesanan kepada si ayah dan si ibu

Salam,
Also a reminder to myself and all beloved parents around the world,

First and foremost....dirikan solat.
Seterusnya....

1. Berikan didikan agama dan duniawi yang terbaik yang kita mampu kepada anak-anak.
2. Berikan nafkah yang halal (makanan yang halal, sumber yang halal).
3. Sekiranya buat pembelian (apa sahaja contohnya minyak kereta, sabun mandi, berus gigi) menggunakan kad kredit, buat pembayaran cepat-cepat supaya tidak dikenakan interest. Ingat, interest itu riba', riba' itu haram.
4. Jagalah aurat dengan sempurna.
5. Tundukkan pandangan, jangan memandang sesuatu yang bukan hak.
6. Bersabar dengan kerenah anak-anak. Bak kata pepatah, merekalah racun, merekalah penawar.
7. Jagalah tutur kata. Mereka belajar daripada kita.
8. Cuba usahakan supaya anak-anak kita berada dalam lingkungan orang-orang yang soleh, yang positif supaya anak-anak kita sentiasa belajar perkara yang baik.
9. Terangkan di dunia ini ada banyak anasir jahat, tapi ajar anak-anak kita berdoa supaya terpelihara daripada sesuatu yang jahat itu.
10. Kenali potensi anak-anak dan dorong mereka supaya berjaya.
11. Bercakap dengan nasihat yang jelas. Instead "jangan malas", sebut "jadi rajin". Instead, "jangan lari", sebut "jalan perlahan".
12. Doakan anak-anak kita...

Banyak lagi, but to me..these are fundamental....Allah knows best.

How to feel good

Salam,
Things that I learn for myself to always feel good:

1. Make myself busy with something good. Pray to Allah that every time will be spent with something useful.
2. Do not blame or give negative comment to a system, a person, or anything unless my comment is really needed for improvement. If what I say will not change anything to be better, I must shut up my mouth.
3. Think think think before I say anything. Do not talk rubbish.
4. Be thankful
5. Try to look everything on it's positive side.
6. Everything that is around me is my teacher. Learn learn learn... therefore, do not look down to anything or anyone, as they can teach me something about life..be good or bad..

The time will come

Salam,

I just know that one of the greatest muslimah in our country has passed away yesterday, Allahyarhamah Dr Lo'Lo'. May Allah bless her and make her one of the dwellers of Jannah..

Fuuhhh...at least her contribution was clear to us. And I believe that she has left us many good examples.

Emmm...but how about the us? Maybe I don't have to think too big or too far. What is more important, try do every small things in a great way, and that will be more meaningful than creating thousands of dreams...

Seek first to understand

In life, I have never been tought or trained to understand people. As I grew up, I kept asking why didn't people understand me?? On the other hand, as I became older, most people expected me to understand them. Conflicts happened between me and my family, my friends, my husband and my little children because sometimes we forgot to understand each other.

Lesson to be learnt, seek first to understand rather than being understood (as what we always find in motivational books). The thing is, it would never be easy. Most of the time, we would have to give up our interest in order to agree with other's opinions. It would be even more difficult if we think that our opinion is the most correct one and can affect us in a negative way if we do not follow our opinion. Hem...

Then come another phrase, "put yourself in one's shoes". Yes, I do not have to argue with this topic anymore. Somemore, the concept of accepting other's interest is in accordance with Islamic teachings, as long as the interest does not give any negative effects to anyone.

So, I must train myself harder to understand people. AND, train my children as well. Understanding people is a skill that needs to be cultivated in our family, and community! May Allah reward us! Amin.

Hari ini aku gembira..

Alhamdulillah....konflik telah selesai di tangani dengan izin Tuhan. Sekarang pintu USAHA terbuka luas. Semoga Tuhan memudahkan langkah kita ke jalan-jalan kebaikan.

Tensi tensi

Dah dua minggu ni aku terlalu susah nak bangun tido. Bila dah bangun tido masih terasa mengantuk, susah nak buka mata. Badan terasa lemah tak berdaya. Seolah semua semangat ku sudah terbang. Hish...sungguh tak seronok. Tengoklah gambar tu....cubaan membeli bunga rose kali ni tak berjaya menceriakan aku. Cuba tersenyum di sebalik bunga pun mata tak mampu terbuka sepenuhnya. Tuhan, berikan aku kekuatan...

Thank you Allah!

Maka yang mana satu nikmat-nikmat Tuhan kamu, yang kamu hendak dustakan (wahai umat manusia dan jin)? [Ar-Rahman: 13]

Bukankah manusia dan jin diutuskan di atas muka bumi Allah ini semata-mata untuk beribadah kepada-Nya? Mudah-mudahan Allah mempermudahkan segala urusan kita dan menjadikan setiap deria kita di setiap saat dalam keadaan ibadah kepada Allah. Memanglah manusia itu lemah, aku lemah.. Tetapi doa itukan senjata umat mukmin..Tiada daya dan upaya kita melainkan dengan pertolongan Allah. Doa biar jelas-jelas...kerana selain berharap hanya kepada Allah, doa itu juga boleh memberi imej yang jelas dalam otak kita untuk berusaha menjadikan gambaran minda kepada realiti, inshaAllah.

Sebetulnya aku cuba memberikan kekuatan kepada diriku sendiri. Tatkala ini aku masih berusaha menyiapkan proposal ku. Hari ini mesti disiapkan, setelah berbulan-bulan perbincangan demi perbincangan diadakan bersama supervisor ku, deraf demi deraf aku sediakan, masa hampir tamat. Semoga Tuhan memberikan ku kekuatan, idea yang bernas dan fokus untuk aku menulis yang terbaik untuk proposalku yang terakhir.

Bukan untuk aku sahaja, bahkan untuk sekelian umat Islam yang lain tak kira di mana kita berada. Tiada yang kecil, pesawah yang bergelumang dengan lumpur juga kerjaya besar, nelayan yang mengharung gelombang juga kerjaya besar, anak kecil yang ke sekolah juga melakukan perkara besar, pembantu rumah juga kerjaya besar. Kerana pada akhirnya yang dipandang Allah adalah usaha dan takwa kita kepada-Nya. Hidayah dan rahmat Allah untuk kita semua!

Cheer up, senyum dan bersyukurlah Huda! :)

Kenapa kita menulis blog?

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah...

Zaman sekarang dah banyak sangat blog-blog dan untuk yang lebih berani, mereka suka buat vlog (post video mereka di you tube untuk berkongsi idea). Tapi sekarang saya cuma nak fokuskan kepada blog. Kenapa kita menulis. Apa pelbagai cara penulisan yang saya perhatikan. Ada yang menulis dengan cara yang sangat mendatar (macam saya). Ada pula yang menulis cara gila-gila hingga saya rasa macam keterlaluan pulak. Ada tu nampak kreatif, bersahaja. Ada pulak yang nampak sangat dibuat-buat, cuba untuk kreatif. Ini sekadar pendapat, bukan nak menghina sesiapa. (Komen ini tidak termasuk penulisan ilmiah oleh tokoh-tokoh akademik).

Kenapa saya menulis? Bila fikir semula rasa macam tak nak menulis. Apatah lagi blog saya ni bukan ada follower. :) Dan saya rasa keliru sikit dengan diri saya. Bila bersyukur saya mengadu pada Tuhan, inshaAllah betul. Tapi bila sedih, merungut, saya letak status di facebook. Betul ke? Macam tak berapa betul...menyerabutkan fikiran orang lain je. Seolah-olah macam nak mengadu pada yang sudi, tapi sebab kita tak tahu siapa yang sudi, kita pun letaklah di facebook, dengan harapan ada yang peduli. :) Macam-macam...patutlah diam lebih baik daripada berkata-kata. Saya cuba. Cuba untuk tidak exaggerate (berlebih-lebih). Manusia memang ada kecenderungan untuk berlebih-lebih untuk kelihatan hebat, padahal perkara tak sebesar mana.. :). Mintak kita dijauhkan.

Okay, wassalam.

The Art of Convincing People

Hey, salam.... (modern way to greet people?..hehe )

Today I'm going to talk about 'the art of convincing people'.

Is that really matters to make people (really) convince of your ideas and opinions? I'm sure it depends on what topic and what situation. Most of the time, a person's reputation is more important that his opinion. We can discuss a lot more factors or ways to make people convince.

But now, I want to stress on ourselves, when we try to make people convince on our opinion. First, we don't have right to force people to agree with us. What we can do is to provide sufficient proofs and try to convey the ideas at the best we can. THEN, accept their response full- heartedly (berlapang dada).

Where is the "art" part? First, to convey, to communicate efficiently, with a suitable body language and face expression. Second, to accept people, not to be angry or frustrated and control your emotion. Even if people agree with your idea, don't be over excited.

Lastly, (note for myself), teach your kids from very early age to express their ideas, to argue in positive ways and to control their emotions. Hehe...don't let your kids copy your bad attitude.

Di manakah aku?

Aku suka bercakap tentang motivasi, tapi aku tak tau teori motivasi. Semuanya yang ku cakap mengikut rasa-rasa aje.
Aku suka isu agama, tapi sikitpun aku tak ingat secara tepat tentang ayat al_Quran ataupun hadis Rasul (SAW).
Aku nak hurai isu mikrobiologi dalam researchku, tapi aku tak mahir langsung pasal mikrob.
Kalau tanya anak-anak aku, mesti aku ni mak yang biasa-biasa aje.
Kalau tanya suami aku, mesti aku ni isteri yang biasa-biasa aje.
Kalau tanya mak aku, mesti aku ni anak yang biasa-biasa aje.
Kalau tanya Ketua jabatan aku pun sama..biasa je.
Kalau tanya supervisor pun, mesti biasa je..
Ape nak jadi dengan aku?
Takkan selamanya aku nak biasa-biasa aje?

Ada sorang ustaz pernah cakap.."manusia dilahirkan dengan potensi masing-masing..".."Ustaz cakap untuk diri dia sendiri, "aku tak dilahirkan untuk jadi manusia biasa-biasa aje.."

Sekarang aku cakap untuk diri aku.."aku tak dilahirkan untuk jadi manusia biasa-biasa aje..paling kurang biarlah paling bermanfaat untuk orang lain...selari dengan hadis nabi tentang manusia hebat ialah orang yang bermanfaat bagi orang lain.."(tak boleh quote lagi pasal ketika ini aku masih biasa...)

Stress

Aku tak lalu makan. Tandanya aku stress.
Mukaku mula dipenuhi jerawat lagi. Tandanya aku stress.
Tidur ku banyak dan sangat susah bangun. Adakah aku stress? (ahahahah...yang ni aku keliru)

Tiada alasan lagi.

Salam.
Dulunya (1996-1997) ketika aku di sekolah menengah aku adalah pelajar jurusan sains tulen. Hanya terdapat satu sahaja kelas sains tulen berbanding empat kelas sains kejuruteraan di sekolah ku. Jelas ketika itu hasrat kerajaan adalah untuk meramaikan jurutera di negara kita. Aku juga heran, mengapa aku layak di kelas sains tulen, kerana setahu ku, cuma mereka yang betul-betul pandai sahaja yang layak di situ. Oh, ya, sebelumnya, aku juga heran mengapa aku mendapat 8 A semasa PMR kerana sesedar aku, aku ini tidak pandai. Malahan pernah di marah oleh cikgu geografi kerana lambat menyiapkan tugasan "projek geografi"yang tersangat penting. Waduh, ini bukan marah-marah biasa ya, marah yang tersangat marah sehingga mengatakan aku lah pelajar malas yang sangat menghairankan guruku itu. Hehehe...(macam tak percaya). Aku percaya "A" yang ku perolehi untuk subjek geografi (dan subjek-subjek lain) adalah daripada pertolongan Allah semata-mata. Kerana di suatu dinihari sebelum peperiksaan PMR kertas geografi, apa yang ku baca, itulah soalan yang keluar keesokan hari nya. Memang atas izin Allah sahaja!
Dan ya, orang puteh kata "miracle does not happen twice". Jadi kemalasan ku ternyata berbayar dengan keputusan SPM ku yang hanyalah 15 aggregat. Agak memalukan untuk aku yang bersekolah di asrama penuh. Hihi..
Tapi, atas perkara lain, aku juga sibuk bercinta monyet. Realiti bahawa aku sedikit cute sebenarnya tidak berapa menguntungkan aku dari segi pelajaran. Tenaga ku yang sepatutnya dialirkan untuk belajar, telah ku bazirkan kepada menulis surat-surat cinta monyet. Hehehe. (Ternyata aku bukan suka, tapi malu dengan cinta monyet itu!).
Oh ya, sambung cerita 15 aggregat ku. Aku agak bersyukur kerana bapaku telah pulang kerahmatullah beberapa bulan sebelum SPM dan beliau tidak mengetahui akan keputusanku yang buruk itu. Kalau tidak, arwah bapaku tentu kecewa.
Jadi, dengan bosan dan patah hati aku pun mengisi borang UPU untuk ke universiti. Dapat pula aku masuk ke matrik UPM di bawah kelolaan kolej swasta, Inpens Kolej yang sekarang ini, Universiti Industri Selangor.
Di situlah aku cuba mengutip cebisan-cebisan semangat ku. Aku berusaha bersungguh-sungguh belajar setekunnya dan cuba untuk bangkit kembali....
Aduh...aku harus melakukan pekerjaan lain sekarang, jadi sambung cerita lain kali.
Mesej aku kali ini, "I not stupid, tapi malas. Sekarang, tiada alasan untuk aku tidak pandai mempelajari apakah itu 'heat shock protein'. Nanti aku sambung cerita".

I'm panic and cannot focus

Tomorrow I will have an appointment with my big supervisor. I'm so nervous because from the meeting with my daily (less big) supervisor yesterday, I still do not really grab his idea and I think that some of his suggestions cannot be materialized and are against the concept that I want to implement in my research.

Now, I'm trying to understand some of microbiology concepts and use the concepts as the reasons of my study. I must do oral practice this evening so that I can explain my ideas and try to make my big and less big supervisors convince of my ideas.

Huh..huh...I'm nervous and cannot focus!

Music lesson

When I was kid, I learned to play keyboard by myself. My sister put label (D,E,F,F#.....) on each key of her keyboard and she also put the same label on her musical notes, therefore I could play the song. It was a small keyboard but I really enjoyed playing it. I remember father said if he was rich, he surely sent me to piano lesson. But then he was never a rich man..but still always a great father. When I was in standard six, I joined my school musical group but we only played pianicas, recorders, an organ and a big drum since our school didn't have money to buy better instruments. But when we played together, the feeling was already perfect for me. (I didn't exactly remember which song we played). The program was organized by Ministry of Agriculture (Sanusi Junid) to give opportunities to students from rural areas to experience music as we knew music was (is) mainly for rich people.

When I went to secondary school I always admired our school orchestra and brass band but I never thought of joining them. I was too shy, I knew for sure.

And until today, I always enjoy piano, or flute, or guitar, or orchestra...and still thinking of joining a piano lesson. My most favourite song is Pachelbel's Canon in D!

On the other hand, due to money and time limitation, I think I should learn on improving my Quran reading...who knows if I die tomorrow......... Even so, I still can enjoy music!

Jangan kecil hati

Jangan kecil hati,
Bila kita tak secantik orang lain
Bila kulit tak seperti telur di kupas
Bila hidung tak seperti orang Turki
Bila pinggang tak seramping Saloma
Bila tak pandai berbahasa seperti Wan Zaleha Radzi
Bila kasut, handbag, perfume, baju tak semahal macam officemate suami
Bila bila bila......
Sampai bila nak bandingkan diri dengan orang lain?
Hehehe..
Cuba kenangkan orang yang lebih susah
BERSYUKURlah!
I am SPECIAL!

What have you learned today??

Eemmmm.... learning process is forever, starting from the day we are born, until the day we die. Look at the photo. She's my youngest daugther. The picture was taken when she was one day old. I believe that at that time she has already in her learning process. She must felt the difference in her environment. For almost 9 months she was in the womb, feeling safe in there, and suddenly there were some external and internal force that made her out to a NEW world. And without knowing she actually learned to feed, listen, see, feel and to communicate with people around her. And the learning process never stop and it is a very natural process.

As we grow, most of us are forced to learn. Of course it is for good reason. Sometimes we never know what on earth we are reading, what are the reasons to know certain things. When this situation happen, there come the important role of parents, teacher or anyone. All the logic and the reasons must be explained carefully to keep the motivation sky high. Slowly, we learn to learn independently. We decide on our own what we want to learn, where should we learn, who are the right person to ask, and how are we going to learn.

Finally all the knowledge must be able to shape us to be a true person. A kind of person that can give most benefits to people around him/her. And that can bring him/her and all the people a successful life, here and here after.

"Ya Allah, reward us with beneficial knowledge and give us the ability to understand"

apa yang saya faham tentang ISTIQAMAH

Dengan nama Allah yang Maha Pemurah lagi Maha Penyayang,

Hari ini saya nak berkongsi dgn anda tentang permahaman saya akan maksud istiqamah dalam kehidupan seharian.

Perhatikan senario ini:

1. Masa sekolah dulu dan masa kita kat universiti, bila nak exam, kita bagai nak rak study. Tiba-tiba masa tengah study kita terfikir, menyesal tak study awal-awal. Tiba-tiba kita sedar otak kita ni bijak, boleh faham apa yang cikgu cuba sampaikan. Nasib baik, score exam, nasib tak baik, cukup makan. Tapi kita tahu dalam hati...sebenarnya aku boleh buat lebih baik kalau aku luangkan masa lebih untuk belajar. Bila habis exam, kita campak buku dan enjoy. Masuk semester baru, kita ulang perangai yang sama..dah nak exam, menyesal lagi...dan macam tulah sampai grad.

2. Ada masa-masanya kita bangun awal, buat kerja rumah atau kerja sekolah..kita rasa bagus (feeling good org Amerika cakap). Tapi adakalanya kita bangun lambat dan kita rasa rugi sangat. Semua program hari tu terbantut disebabkan pagi kita yang lewat.

Aha...cukuplah dua contoh terdekat dalam diri kita.

Ulasannya....andai kita istiqamah...setiap hari study...setiap hari perah otak....latih diri untuk fokus, kewajipan ini akan jadi rutin dan kita rasa tak terbeban dengan tugasan kita. Perhatikan maksud istiqamah adalah sama dengan rutin. Istiqamah akan memberikan kesan rutin dalam hidup kita.

Nampak mudah...tapi ingat. Selalunya kita berlawan dengan faktor lain yang nampak lagi best contohnya membaca facebook, membaca blog orang, berborak dengan kawan, tengok tv, jalan-jalan dan main dengan kawan, window shopping dengan suami.. Contoh yang dah saya senaraikan tadi ternyata lebih best daripada baca buku, baca jurnal, tulis paper, analisa data, kan???

Seperkara lagi, bila dah tido (terutama perempuan bila datang haid)...wah, susah betul nak bangun. Jadi bila dah rutin bangun solat subuh selama lebih kurang (28 (penuh) -7 (haid) =21 (hari bersih)) 21 hari, tiba-tiba bila haid bermula kita tido lebih sikit sebab nak balas dendam, sebenarnya kita dah rosakkan rutin 21 hari tu... :) sebab itulah kita susah nak konsisten dengan prestasi kita..

Dah, jangan panjang-panjang. Marilah kita cuba istiqamah..bangun pagi solat subuh, jangan tidor semula tapi buatlah aktiviti yang berfaedah, kemudian solat dhuha, ...sampai malam, cuba bangun solat malam. Amin...memang sangat ideal, tapi mesti ada cita-cita. Kalau gagal cuba lagi cuba lagi cuba lagi. Sambil tu doa banyak dengan Allah ya. Amin.

Terima kasih kerana membaca!

Spring at Wageningen

It is already end of May..we are entering summer. Anyway, I attach here some photos I captured since last March using my Nokia hand phone camera.

Things I did only at Wageningen

Just want to share this with you..(especially my family). From top:

1. Cooked 'beef bourguignon' with two french friends and my friend, Huda (once)
2. Attended a theater performed by students (once)
3. Helped Kak Mai moved to her new place (once)
4. Chat with hubby (once a week)
5. Cycle (almost everyday)
6. Barbecue (once)
7. Sit and watch ducks and think of old memories with Adam and hubby fed the ducks together (always)
8. Go to kebab Elayda (twice a month)

Emmm....trust me...I never do this in Malaysia...except cycling or barbecueing once in a blue moon..hehe

Bored to death

Actually I'm so bored. I really hate to admit this. Normally I always try to get rid of my negative feeling but now I'm not. I have to write my proposal but I'm so lazy like a garfield. Is garfield a really lazy cat? I don't know. But why that lazy cat was so popular long time ago? I think he had a very wierd voice, like an old man's voice and not so cute at all. Opps..maybe I am wrong? Emmm....anyway I like to see garfield, but not to hear his voice.

In three hours from now I'm going to watch a movie. Actually it is not a commercial movie and I don't have to pay any money to watch it. It is a documentary about transition in Liberia. I read from the synopsis, "an unusual story about the great courage of Muslim and Christian women in Liberia who, regardless of faith, decide to work together to end the country's bloody civil war and bring peace back to a country in ruins..............and finally the 14-year civil war that saw hundred of thousands killed, massacres of the civillian population and widespread rape, was brought to an end by them..." (my comment, of course not only them..there must be other people who took action too).

Watching movie is not a usual occasion for me. Why? yeah why....I know there are many creative people creat good movies. I am just not into movies though I find watching movies are interesting. Maybe because I was told that in cinemas, not all people behave nicely. There are some youngsters who watch movie and at the same time, make movie. You know what I mean. So, it is not really a good place to be. Oh, I might sound stupid. Nevermind, this is (just) an opinion and no one are forced to accept it. Oh, I also think that the ticket is expensive. Coz I am a stingy person. Hehe. Another one reason (if this can be called a reason), I heard during 13 May 1969, some people burnt one of the cinemas in Kuala Lumpur. (13 May 1969 was a tragic day in which Malays and Chinese fought each other and many were killed). So, I imagine myself in one cinema when suddenly the place was caught on fire. Again, I might sound stupid.

Emm...actually my story can be related to a saying "hendak seribu daya, tak nak seribu dalih" (when you want something, you'll do everything to get it, and when you don't want something, you invent thousand reasons to avoid it).

OOOOooooohhhh......end of story. Get back to work lazy garfield!!

But, never forget, the smallest thing you do, whether it is bad or not, it will be judge by the Almighty. So, think before you do anything! :)

**Picture shown is not related to the story.

Arranging the biggest jigsaw puzzle!

I have just finished my 10 000 pieces of jigsaw puzzle. The final picture is really amazing. It is somewhat better because I could elaborate the picture into very great detail. It is even the best because I could give complete reason of every single thing that is happening in the picture, for example why the picture was taken at that time, why the sky was blue, why the trees were green, and what most important, WHY DID I PICK THAT SPECIFIC PUZZLE?

--------------------------------------------@@

Lets begin with end in mind.

That was I just did. I imagined that I have completed my future four years life. But in fact I've just started. And I was a bit tired already (actually too tired, but I don't want to admit that..hehe..). What to happen in the next four years?

1. The 10th year of our marriage

2. Adam is 9 years old = a standard three bright student

3. Nur Fatima is 7 years old = a standard one highly motivated student

4. Hannah is 5 years old = a little girl with an endless curiosity

5. I finish my PhD

6. My husband and I as a great achiever and higher degree closer to Allah

Ameen.

--->> now back to WORK! :)

Busy busy

Dear friends,

Besides reading many and many scientific articles everyday, I also spend some time to read novels (which I can hardly do it when I am in Malaysia). *smile* Why? It is because I'm too busy.

Too busy. Many people said that "too busy" is really a bad excuse. So, let's use different term of too busy, which is, "I'm fully occupied with other responsibilites which are much more important". Now, any objection? *smile* Let me continue the story of my responsibilities.

Back in my country (Malaysia) (oh, now I'm at Wageningen, The Netherlands), I am a wife, a mother of three, a daughter, a staff at University Putra Malaysia, and a part of community which I live. I normally out of home from 9:00 to 18:00 (driving, at office doing my work, breakfast, lunch, etc.). From 18:00 to 9:00 (in the next morning) I am at home, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, and most important, taking (a good) care of my children and be nice to my husband. *smile*. I do all the house chores alone and sometimes with the help of my husband when he is not too tired.

Poor children since me and my husband are less efficient when we are at home. We are already tired after office hour and with very minimum energy, we have to give attention to our children. It is really challenging for me. You know what I mean, having a 5 year, 3 year and 8 month baby is not easy...remember.

But I'm happy and really thankful. I do not have to describe further why am I happy and thankful. I believe as I am getting older, I develop the skills to manage my life for example to control my feeling, to communicate efficiently and be more cheerful and helpful.

Oh, before I end, just another story of a busy parent. My husband received a call from our eldest son's (Adam) Q-dees school headmistress this morning. She told my husband that tomorrow is their school sports day. Hem, my husband didn't alert of the big day because he has been too busy with his office work. And unfortunately my husband has to go to Kota Kinabalu tomorrow for National Suzuki Dealer Conference. No one from our close relatives are available tomorrow to take Adam to his sports day. Poor little boy. Adam has to miss his sports day which I guess one of the biggest events for him this year. I am a bit sad... However, that is life! I believe Adam will have another probably bigger sports event in coming years. Yes, let's hope so. :)

Bye for now!

LOST...

Imagine that you were walking on a street with a map in your hand. Suddenly you arrived at a junction and you didn't know which direction to go. You looked at the map but failed to locate your position. Now you were confirmed that you had lost! You looked around and hoped someone would appear. You looked up to the sky hoping for a sign. Unfortunately nothing happened. The wheather was getting hotter that you know you had to find a shelther. You went under a tree, took out your mineral water and wiped your forehead. Uhhh......that was the only sound that could be uttered from your mouth. What should you do? You took a deep breath and thought. You could never stay there because that place was not belong to you. You sort of knowing your final destination but now you were lost. Then you knew for sure that you had to continue your journey no matter where it would lead to. Because the only hope for you was you. In you, you must believe and Allah you surrendered to..

Harapan

Harapan boleh terbahagi kepada beberapa contohnya;

1. Harapan kepada diri sendiri
2. Harapan kepada orang lain
3. Harapan kepada Allah.

Izinkan saya menghurai ketiga-tiga harapan di atas berdasarkan pemahaman saya sendiri. Dimulai dengan harapan kepada Allah. Harapan ini adalah sesuatu yang tidak boleh putus daripada seorang hamba kepada Tuhannya. Harapan kepada rahmat Allah membuatkan kita sentiasa tenang dalam menghadapi situasi apapun. Namun, praktis tidaklah semudah pemahaman. Seringkali manusia itu lupa mengharap yang terbaik, bahkan menyesali apa sahaja nasib yang menimpa diri. Tapi manusia itukan bersifat lupa dan pengetahuan mereka sangat terbatas. Oleh itu, disarankan agar kita sentiasalah bersilaturrahim dengan orang-orang yang soleh dan berilmu supaya dapat sentiasa kita pelajari sesuatu yang baik daripada mereka.

Huraian kedua berkisar tentang harapan kepada orang lain. Kita selalu berpendapat sesuatu perkara itu wajib dilakukan oleh orang lain, dan sering pula orang itu lupa. Nah, apakah konsekuensinya? Adakah kita layak berasa marah, kecewa, sedih atau apa? Ya, sebagai manusia normal kita pasti berasa sesuatu. Perasaan itu maksudnya apa? Sayang, benci, prihatin? Sungguh kompleks.... Kerana, kita hanya tahu tentang persepsi kita tetapi tidak pernah tahu secara tepat akan persepsi orang lain. Kita selalunya cenderung merasakan persepsi kita betul, namun mereka juga pasti merasakan persepsi mereka betul. Jadi bagaimana? Haruskah kita terus-terusan membuat agakkan (assumption)? Jadi dalam kes ini, sekiranya harapan kita terhadap orang lain salah sama sekali, dan ternyata tidak mendatangkan apa-apa keuntungan, baik kita biarkan sahaja. Cuba letakkan diri kita ditempat mereka, atau letakkan diri kita di tengah-tengah. Oh, sungguh mudah menyatakan tetapi secara praktisnya pasti tidak semudah itu.

Yang terakhir ialah harapan kepada diri sendiri. Perkara yang paling utama ialah cuba belajar sebaik mungkin menangani perbezaan yang terdapat di sekeliling kita. Memaksa orang lain lain untuk berubah adalah hampir mustahil, namun memujuk diri sendiri untuk menjadi lebih rasional adalah yang terbaik. Aduh, cakap memang senang kan. Tapi inilah ciri-ciri orang yang berjaya. Tahu bila untuk berkata sesuatu, tahu bila perlunya untuk diam, dan tahu bila masanya untuk bertindak. Jadilah proaktif. Tenang.

Haraplah kepada diri sendiri untuk menjadi ibu, anak, isteri, pelajar, pekerja dan ahli masyarakat yang terbaik. Dan haraplah kepada Allah untuk menunjukkan jalan yang lurus supaya kita menjadi manusia yang terbaik.

Journey with best friend

He is my best friend.
I quarrel with him a lot.
But we share the same mission and vision.
Sometimes we are in the same boat, but we paddle to different direction,
though we know we want to go to the same place.
I am always the one who make things more complicated.
On contrary, he is always the one who make things easy and sometimes too easy.
But always we try to balance.
Sure, it is not easy and we quarrel again and again.
At the end of the day, we say "I love you" and we go to sleep.
In our sleep we never forget to dream.
Sometimes we have fantastic dreams, that give us hopes.
Sometimes we have nightmares, that send us reminders.
No matter what, we enjoy our life together.
We bravely face all the obstacles together.
and we pray the HE will show us the right way, and shower us with HIS blessing and mercy.

Your best friend.

Para Pencari Tuhan (Indonesian Sinetron)

Hey dude! :)

I'm a big fan of this Indonesian Sinetron, Para Pencari Tuhan. The story was about Bang Jack, a surau care taker and three young men, Juki, Chelsea and Barong. The three young men were prisoners but decided to be a better person. They met Bang Jack and Bang Jack agreed to share his knowledge on religious matters and other skills like gardening. This drama tells how they deals with their own life and the people in the village. The uniqueness of this drama is how religious matters are discussed in simple manner and sometimes funny, but still able to give huge impact to the audience. In other words, "dakwah yang hikmah dan berkesan".

The story has already 4 series. If you're interested, try to follow from Part 1 by searching for "Para Pencari Tuhan 1" and also "Para Pencari Tuhan 2" for the next series in youtube. However, I myself couldn't find for "Para Pencari Tuhan 1, episode 1, part 1". I only found 'Para Pencari Tuhan 1, episode 3, part 3". The language is understandable for Malays though they speak Indonesian languange.

InshaAllah, Pak Deddy Mizwar (Bang Jack) and also as producer of this drama will not disappoint you!.



Till then, chow!

How to be happy?

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah...

Dear readers (I wonder if there's any reader..hehe),

Anyways..I'm doing good..I hope everybody is good too.

My simple question for today.. What can make you happy?

Write down the "things that make me happy" on a piece of paper. Read them carefully...and find time to do all the things! If you don't know what can make you happy, maybe you can try to see my lists, perhaps you can copy and try whether those things will make you happy or not! :)

Things that can make Norulhuda (that's me) happy.

1. A clean house ---> lets do cleaning!
2. Listen to good music ---> for example see below;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NgDX2xpGwAU&feature=player_embedded

3. Eat when I'm hungry
4. Sleep when I'm sleepy
5. Wake up early in the morning
6. Hugs my babies
7. I love nature! I love observing the trees.. especially when I'm at Wageningen, the trees are the best things to observe...how do they change over the autumn, winter, and spring!
8. See kids play (any kids! I just love to watch them playing...their laugh, tears...really make me feel alive!
9. The feeling during and after shower (really fresh!)
10. During I brush my teeth
11. Whenever I learn something new

....and the list goes on.....

As a conclusion...you don't have to go far to find happiness. Happiness is inside you. Appreciate yourself..do the best at every moment...be more sensitive towards yourself. And thank your God....your Creator who has made you.

Jazakallahu khairan kathira,
Norulhuda, Wageningen, Marijkeweg, Zodiac, 10.09 am, 14 April 2011, 10 Jamadil A- Awwal 1432.

Wageningen, I'm back.

I don't belong here. But I'm so thankful to be here.

The moment I was out from the airplane on 15 February 2011 I smelled Netherlands. The smell was totally different from Malaysia. The cold air blended with the smell of coffee, the ground, the leaves, the building, they've got their own smell that quickly reminded me of my last 2 years here in the Netherlands. I felt excited and sad. I missed my family already especially because last time we (my husband (Nan), Adam, Fatima, and my mother) were here together.

Two years are short. I can close my eyes and cycle as I remember every turns. Things have not changed much. Only the post kantoor has closed, some other shops have moved to other places, some close, and the nearest shop from our home at Riemsdijkstraat is no longer there. We used to shop there almost every time. As far as I remember, the shop was actually the place Adam learned to buy biscuits, fruits, ice cream, chocolate and even books. :) Once, he took an apple and ate it straight away. And in front of the shop Adam was licked by a very huge dog. Uhh...memories....but I'm quite thankful the shop is not there anymore or else I will feel more sad remembering us together. It has been a week now and I still see Nan and Adam wherever I go because I was with them almost everywhere.

Fortunately my room is at Haarweg, a place we've never been together before. :) The room has two florescent lights that makes it very bright. Normally dutch will use a very dim orange light for their house but since the building used to be an office building so we do not have the orange light. So lucky. It is a huge room. I like it.

21 February 2011, 8.28 pm Dutch time, 3.28 am Malaysian time.

leaving for ....

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah,

I'll be leaving for The Netherlands next Monday! Feeling nervous to start my PhD, to travel alone again, but at the same time excited! AND...to be away from my beloved ones..hubby, adam, fatima, hannah, and sisters, a brothers, and....mak. :). Gonna miss them so much especially my baby, hannah (oh Allah, she's so adorable). But inshaAllah 6 months will not be that long. I will just have to focus on my study! Things will be just fine...ameen..

Okay, going to write more together with more pictures once I'm in the Netherlands. Tata!

-Huda, 8 February, 4.33 p.m